Christopher Rowe

Once again I find myself on a train travelling to a new country, in this case Cologne in Germany.


We had a great three day stay in Amsterdam; doing various city and country tours, visiting the Heineken museum and the house or rather attic of Anne Frank.


Our last day saw us venture out early in the morning for a morning stroll along various canals, DSLR in tow, taking photos of the unique architecture of Amsterdam, the multi-story column houses, all stacked like dominos against one another, in some instances leaning on one another for mutual support.


What makes Amsterdam’s historical architecture so unique are the footing foundations. With the soil in Amsterdam being so soft, all the historic buildings have wooden pillar foundations – which is all well and good until some 80 years later when the wood begins to rot.


Although Amsterdam seems to be a city of various canals, do not let the abundance of water fool you – the water level in the canals is strictly regulated so wet wood stays wet, and dry wood stays dry. Without control measures like these in effect, the wood will rot and the buildings will come down.


After our morning stroll, we stopped back by our hotel to swap the DSLR for something a little more inconspicuous and then headed back out to the Red Light District.


There isn’t much difference between day time and night time at the Red Light district; the girls start arriving at their windows around midday, the live shows start a few hours after this. So by 2pm, it is business as usual.


The shops in the Red Light District offer everything from ornamental items, to items with functional uses, including the moulds of your favourite porn star – ready for use.


Also popular in the Red Light District, indeed in most of Amsterdam for that matter are ‘Coffee Shops’. It should be said there is a distinct difference between Cafe’s and Coffee Shops. One sells Coffee primarily and the other sells soft-drugs such as magic mushrooms and maruajna – and it’s not the Coffee Shop that sells coffee!


After a walk around Michelle and I stopped at a pub in the district with a window view looking out across the canal at a few of the girls windows. Out of the eight or so windows in view, only four of them were in use. We both knocked back a few pints whilst there sitting in amusement watching the men walk past and the girls, behind their glass doors tapping at the glass trying to get their attention.


One girl in particular was full of spirit (the one in pink below) trying to entice customers in by doing a show in the window. She gets 10/10 for effort, but I was bemused (as I am sure she must of been) that this didn’t give her any business. Michelle and I put it down to perhaps she was too intimidating, as weirdly enough in the hour or so we were there, the girl at the end, the least ‘fit’ of them all was doing great business.

At the end of the night, with Michelle and I having walked up and down the Red light district a few more times and seeing a few live sex shows we decided enough was enough and went to head back to our hotel. On the way back we passed by the window where the same energetic girl was, she seemed to be getting nowhere. So I decided to see what her deal was.


The girls in Amsterdam are quite the professionals, very discrete (despite their obvious attire and glowing red lighting), they would ignore couples that passed by with not so much as a wink, guys in groups the girls entertained, but even they were not a sure deal. Guys walking by themselves though got quite a bit of attention.


With that said, leaving Michelle on the otherside of the bank, all money and credit cards stripped bare from me as an insurance policy (her idea, not mine), I strutted back around the other side of the bank where the girl in pink still stood, with a split second of eye contact, she opens up her door, sticks her head out and in a siren like way says ‘hey there sexy, do you want to come inside?’. Now if that line wasn’t a winner, and the fact she had a pretty good body wearing a little pink lingerie number didn’t work either, the hot rush of warm air from inside her heated room blowing past your face out into the cold, freezing canal where you stood would have definitely been inviting enough to step in.


The conversation lasted another minute or so with me asking for the rates and what they included, pretty much confirming what I had previously been informed, 50 euro for s&f, and in her case, another 50 euro (so 100 euro all up) for the associated removal of clothing, touching, kissing etc.


With that, a smooth exit was in need, so I politely smiled back, saying I’d give it some thought and maybe see her later (had to put her down gently), and walked back around the canal to where Michelle was waiting, her camera in hand, documenting the whole exchange from distance.


That was our final play in Amsterdam’s Red Light District.


Later that evening we concluded our Amsterdam trip with a canal tour, romantically candle lit, with a variety of cheese and wine on each table, we began our two hour cruise gently down the endless canals.


Our river boat featured a French guide, who on occasion would point out a significant land mark or tell a story relating to the area we passed through. Approaching the end of our tour, the guide announced that as a special treat we’d be stopping by the red light district and for those interested will disembark for a quick walk around. Some of the people on the boat obviously hadn’t made it that far into Amsterdam yet, so they got off quite keen, two other couples including Michelle and I stayed on the boat – we were both incredibly red-lighted-out by then.


All up Amsterdam was great, but I think it’s one of those places you can only do in moderation, three days was ample, otherwise you’d only be repeating the same things over and over again.


There is only so much pot smoke one can tolerate, the Red Light District in particular was shrouded by it, and although Michelle and I didn’t participate in this recreational activity, we definitely had some good times.


Next stop, Cologne, Germany!